As you grow older, you will realise how complicated the world actually becomes.. I have always admired the innocence of a child and how some people still carry it on into adulthood. Adults have to worry about trust issues, moral issues, so why can't we just let some of these barriers slide? We are always out to protect ourselves from others and end up hurting those who are out to protect you.

Sometimes, I am just as confused as to what to do, or what I really want out of life. Mostly, I lack courage to pursue what I really want in life... I want to seek out my happiness but have never taken the first steps to get them.

I really wish the world could be a less complicated place but I know in reality it isn't. I want to hold on to the things I love but they are slowly slipping away... The world continues to move on but I haven't, and that is what's bothering me. I hate to be self-loathing, how ironic is that, I just want the happiness I thought I had found 3 years ago, maybe even 1 year ago when life was interesting, unbelievable as it may sound, the air force was interesting to see the emotions and interactions played out.

University, on the other hand, has dealt me a losing hand... I hope life is simple and that is more than I could ever have wished for... What happened to easily making friends, fraternising with the enemies and have a good laugh afterwards once they become friends? Now, I feel I am on the other side of the fence, jealous of others who have found good companionship. Am I taking for granted for the people I have met? Or am I just afraid I know they are going to drift away sooner or later...